It's really fascinating to watch the actions of a pre-verbal child, notice some repeated action and recognise a possible significance of it for them. Then you have the chance to respond with a follow-up action which may make a meaningful link for them, or help them achieve a goal.

This morning G(19 months) and I were in the sandpit at playcentre. After sorting out spades and some little tractors, G commenced to dig at the sand. A few minutes later I noticed her sitting in the sand making a repeated action. She was tipping sand from her spade into a little pile, and tapping the pile flat with the back of the spade. This seemed very familiar, and after a minute I realised that she might be reinacting the action you make when tamping down the sand in a bucket for a sand-castle. A hasty search around found some buckets, we filled one (tamped with the appropriate action) and turned it out. From her face, G was certainly pleased with this outcome - and she responded to a fresh sand-castle in time-honoured toddler fashion!

There is, of course, a sense of satisfaction in this glimpse into the child's mind and the feeling that you have helped them achieve a goal. What strikes me more on this occasion is that this is the first time that I have made a sand-castle with G. So she is bringing an experience she has of sand from home. She is making a connection between her life outside, and within, this new care relationship. Building (and knocking down) sand castles is a pretty common activity in Kiwi culture. In terms of our relationship, it is something that she brought, and an experience which we now share together.