Birthday parties - without pressure

I have just listened to a nine-to-noon segment on kids birthday parties, the ridiculous lengths some parents go to with them, and ways to avoid this. (Podcast here, but it expires after a week.) They talked about an American website Birthdays Without Pressure, which also talks about similar things. But I think (as in everything!) the American experience seems to go to extremes. (Probably comes of having a much larger population, and the extremes getting the news...)

They suggest planning a party for what the kid wants (this probably needs to be within reason) NOT what the parent want just to keep up with the Jones'. A common-sense approach - a feature which some people lack, of course. Here's an excerpt:

Sometimes as parents we plan the party we want, or the party we think the community expects, but not necessarily the party that our children really want. Here are some questions you might ask your child before you start planning this year’s party.

1. What was your favorite birthday party?
2. What was fun about it?
3. What was not fun?
4. What do you remember most about it?
5. How many kids do you think you should have at a party?
6. What was fun about a friend’s party?
7. What are your favorite games to play at a party?
8. How many presents would be enough?
9. How many kids would be enough?

We have Sophie's birthday coming up. In our house you get the sort of birthday celebration that your sisters had at that age (Kate is the trend setter). For a #12 you get: A) to go to Strawberry Fare with Mum, and B) an 'afternoon tea' party for some friends. Sophie will get A on Sunday, but B will be next weekend, as we are busy with Elanor's first communion this weekend.

As for expense, I used to do a birthday party on a very tight budget indeed. This time it's 7 kids to the pool, then home for pizza and cake, and possibly games if enough time. A treasure hunt (with mini chocolates at the end) is almost compulsory around here. Bern is our expert at treasure hunts. (Actually, we always did it that I did the food and he did the games.) Treasure hunts get more complicated as you get older, and are usually of a co-operative nature.

Hopefully there'll be pics after the event.